The boring part
Terms
The rules for using the site and sending us stories.
It's comedy
Stories here are told for laughs. They're not accusations about real people, and details are changed so nobody can be identified. The first stories on the site were written by us and are labelled that way.
Sending us a story
- You're 18 or older.
- It's your story to tell, and it's true to the best of your memory, or clearly exaggerated for effect.
- You've removed names and anything else that could identify another person.
- You give us permission to edit it, change details, and publish it on this site, in our emails, and on our social accounts, without paying you.
- That permission isn't exclusive. It's still your story.
- We won't use your story or your words on merchandise without asking you separately.
- We don't have to publish anything, and we'll take a story down if you ask.
The merch
The slogans and designs are ours. Please don't copy them onto your own products. When the shop opens, purchases, shipping, returns and refunds follow the store's terms, linked from the shop page.
Ads
Ads, when they run, come from an ad network. We don't make the products in them and we're not responsible for them. Report a bad ad to hello@pettyass.com.
Sharing our stuff
Share and link to anything. Screenshot a story and post it with credit. Don't republish the whole site as your own.
Limits
The site's provided as is. To the extent the law allows, we're not liable for what you do after reading a story here. Please don't do the illegal ones.
Contact
hello@pettyass.com. Updated September 2026.